Torn Shoes

Far ahead in Iran
The kid loses the shoes of his sister
Little hands can't buy a big pair
So, ran the tiny legs

Not all races need to be won
For some, third place is the only victory

Smile on the face of a little sister -
is the only glory that exists

Far ahead it might be
It's the closest i have ever been
Put the hearts of all men together
A kid's heart still wins

Of all the art that exists
Majid Majidi has the only truth

all i have is a few arbitrary lines
and a heart full of gratitude

if not for words
where is the reprieve?

Forgetful

I have always been forgetful by nature. I forget to remember the names of so many important people that i cannot recollect how many of them did i really forget. Anyway, i realized today morning while i slipped on the stairs that i do not think in my mother tongue anymore. A little litmus test to understand what language does a man think in is this: Throw him off-balance without his notice, the sudden squeal that comes out is the exact sound of the language he belongs to. Well, my sound was this: "geesh!!"
Of all the things i could have said - i said "geesh". I do not even know if it is a word. Probably, am not thinking in a language anymore. Or more realistically, i do not think anymore! After the powerful early morning occurrence, i decided to think in my natural language - telugu, the whole day. It was a tough exercise, believe me. The couple of client calls definitely didn't help the matter. I was trying to think in telugu - translate it to hindi (which became my second tongue after the long years in bombay)and then articulate it in english. It was a journey on the razor edge and i was playing by the ear. Well, it wasn't a pleasant experience and i cursed myself later for having actually done that. However, it revealed to me that am still capable of thinking in all my basic languages. And am glad at the thought.

For tomorrow - i want to think only in symbols.
Godspeed.

JuxTaposition

Empty spaces and hollow forms
Loud noises of high pitches
Sting through the fabric -
and remain

Flow of river across the patches of land
Connects the tomorrow to yesterday

A tall tree bends to give shade
'Somehow', it says,
'nothing connects to today'!

Tip

If you have a free day
Learn to enjoy movies and food alone

A day will come when you will need the art.

Distant

On the surface
Choice exists in the smooth key pad -
and on-demand
it's a world full of free men like you
who live the will

And if you were the surface
you probably laugh all the time
tell me you don't find it funny
all the thought landscape

Stone to stone you move
go round and square; triangles too?
meet Elizabeth and the time machine
Trying to escape

And not.

In the end,
it's only coke-
and some popcorn

If life were an object,
it surely would be a TV remote
Only, you can't switch it back on

Hang on to the red light.

If ever

If ever the song paints
If ever the haze disappears
If ever the prison wall seems too low
If ever the curve straightens
If ever the brick looks a brick
If ever the doors are closed
If ever the mysticism ends
If ever the smile comes back
If ever the guitar gets tuned
If ever..

Then may the light arise!

Magic

Wave after wave
Far from the shore and deep inside
Sounds of balafon -
And some samba

Legs curled up -
Every atom is dancing
There is a twinkle
Lips move apart

Cool breeze
And a sip of hot coffee
Magic!
What else is?

Release

In the midst of woods -
spiral branches and smell of earth
green on the out and brown inside
the colors fade by the minute

Violet oozes out of the stem
Smoothely kissing the wet cheeks
Trembling hands rush to stop
Wind chill is the new lord

Yellow life crawls up the orange oak
Sticks and stings - the wounds remain

Night blanket wraps around the moon
Take my hug and bring me warmth
Heavy sphere, got any ear?

Sometimes, i wakeup on the tenth floor
Strange that the building has only seven in the morning

Emotion needs to learn algebra
Release is but a solution that never exists

In, from out

"Love kicks the ass of space and time!"

- Hafiz, A Persian poet

Steve, Bill and Icecream

If you were born in the 80s like me, you were probably thrown into this world when it was going through a very important series of events. The cold war ended during this period. There was uprise of urban middle-class in the US and Europe. Middle class young adults fresh out of MBA-schools were getting adequately rich to get pretty cars and prettier women. It was a period when movies and music began to get commercialized into the mainstream as we see it today. It was also a time when Microsoft and Apple started doing things which made them so fantastically successful as they are now. I wouldn't mention Infosys here as much of the value creation due to them only began to happen in the 1990s. The point however is that these are really really powerful events if you come to think of it. A lot of things happened so positively well together that it just pushed the eco-system to a higher layer and order of basic elements.

I feel unlucky because of two things. One, i wasn't born in the west, where the action always seems to be more "now" than in the east. Two, read one again. The eco-system is so much more real in the west as compared to the east and it both inspires and scares me. I am inspired because i get hope that if humans can do it at some space and time, humans elsewhere surely have the potential to do it. I am scared because i feel the eco-system is so terribly damaged that it might take a lot of time and space. One reason it is bound to take a a lot of time is that there is a lot and lot of space to cover. What can speed up the process is something only Mustafa Gaus knows. It is very important to find him.

When i was in school, a friend of mine used to tell me repeatedly about this little nugget of wisdom. He told me about this so many times that i now kind of believe in it. I think that is what it takes to convince someone about something. Just persevere and constantly bombard them with your alternative imagery of space-curve. Sooner or later, they will bend in. It is probably always the latter. Well, the nugget of wisdom was this. If you take away the wealth of all the rich people in the world and redistribute it among everybody in the world equally, the wealth will get back to the same or similar set of people very soon. That is just how the whole thing is programmed! You either have it in you or you don't. There are no two ways about it. Well, wisdom or not, it is surely an interesting way to look at things. For me, it always is a favorite thing to ponder about. If you know the essential DNA of what makes people of different walks of life wealthy and those elements which restrict progress, you can become the most powerful consultant, the world has never known. The key word, however, is "If". Nobody seems to know the answer even though people throw this crap around a few common phrases around doing the right thing, making your passion your job, etc. Well, if my passion should be my job, who will pay me for eating ice cream?


It dawned on me today that am close to hit a quarter century of my lifetime on this planet and am supposed to have a perspective of what life form is all about and where is that am supposed to take mine.

I pondered about it a lot and this is what i have concluded-

Eat a lot of ice cream.


The 1980s are also termed as the period of "greed".
I for some reason, think that greed is probably always good. The collective greed of all humans is probably what makes the seemingly complex human and para-human systems tick and move. Amen.

Agony

http://www.rediff.com/money/2007/oct/24india.htm

The latest report by AT Kearney talks about something as trivial as the fact that sky is blue. Yes, 800 million of Indians live on less than two dollars a day. Less than half the people are connected to the power grid. Note more than 5% are connected to the internet and all that jazz.

But, you know what? India still ranks high on happiness surveys. Surely, money or material wealth is not a source of happiness. They discovered and wrote about this in the vedas and upanishads a zillion years ago. We surely know the true path to happiness in the east.

Or, do we?

How about a village with electricity round the clock and clean water to drink?
How about adequate provision of healthcare in every nook n corner?
How about your distant cousin in the village having the chance to go to a good school?

Will that not bring any happiness?

May be we need to re-write our vedas. And give ourselves a little chance.

Cold

Time is staring at the watch
Laughing crazy like never before
Perhaps, never after

Chillness in the veins
Exhaust from the constant rupture
Numb feet and the gibberish
Ah, familiar

How i wish it was a dream.

A bird whispers silence into my mind
Can you a sing a song too? please

Far away in Mexico, the little girl is smiling
Her grandma wants to use the face book

Pumpkin festival

Confession

- Loius Gluck

To say I'm without fear--
it wouldn't be true.
I'm afraid of sickness, humiliation.
Like anyone I have my dreams.
But I've learned to hide them,
to protect myself
from fulfillment: all happiness
attracts the Fates' anger.
They are sisters, savages--
in the end, they have
no emotion but envy.

Impossible is Nothing

Have you ever taken a course in mass transfer? If not, do not read any further!

For if you have gone through the rituals, you are most likely to remember the book by treybal. If you are the unfortunate Phd kind, you probably still sleep over it.

This is not about the book. This isn't even about me. It is about a man and his deepest fears coming true!

I hated it from the bottom of my heart ever since i first met with the book. Whenever i opened the pages, i felt like i was being tied to a tree and punished with a hunter! The piercing pain and the imaginary smell of the silkened flesh still linger fresh in my memory. The psychometric charts looked like the kitchen of the devil who was cooking my misery. The problems about the distillation plants made me feel sad for the african girls who were being sold in the markets of Ethiopia. I felt a strong cord of distinct similarity. When you are forced to do something you dislike so much and there is no way out, what do you do about it?

Well, not much i guess.

Time moved on. Mass transfer became a thing of history and treybal was a happy man ever after. I actually don't remember an instance where i felt anything remotely bad for him. Even when i was going through the pain, i felt sad for the guy who had actually had to write a book about transfer of mass from a phase to an other. He probably doesn't have to worry about hell as he has lived through it!

A typical hindi movie romance starts with a fight between the boy and the girl and ends up with them falling in love. I never believed in it!


Well, most of the time, beliefs shouldn't change! That leaves for some time when they are allowed to change!

I met with the book again on this weekend. I happened to meet a friend doing his Phd at MIT and he was kind enough to let me into the room where he stores this book and treats it with atmost devotion!

I didn't know what to do for a minute. Here i was, face to face with my devil. My deepest fear. My deadliest nemesis. I slowly but surely moved towards it. I took the book in my hand and began to feel it's texture. In a single momentary flash, the entire history dawned itself before my eyes. I started going through the pages. The very psychometric charts from the past began to look like innocent puppies. It doesn't feel anywhere close to a devil's workshop. I went through the pages which discuss distillation plants. I felt something melt inside me. There were tears in my eyes.

The wonder for me is that i couldn't bring myself to hate the thing i thought was my worst enemy. I felt like i was holding a teddy bear in my hands.

I think this is a lesson for every man who is scared of something. anything. The thing that you are scared of is probably not the reason for your misery. The reason lies inside you. And gladly for me, the reason doesn't exist anymore!

Happy Days!

A few things can touch you.
A few other can move you.

Very rarely, few things do happen which can actually make you cry!

Shekhar Kammula, is a director with a magic wand. Happy Days is a must watch if you want to add quality to a few of your hours on the weekend.

It has everything you want from a movie and may be a lot more. The story is very simple yet immensely powerful that you actually stop treating it as just a movie. It is everybody's story. Anybody who went onto study after highschool, will relate to this movie to the highest degree of congruence. A run-of-the mill story but shot with such elegance and freshness which needs to be seen to realize it.

Acting in the movie is such a natural beauty! There are several independent stories each linked to the other and create great screenplay in the process. The new actors (i have never seen them before) did a great job! The background music tracks are very soothing and impressive.

Freshie ragging, Puppy love, Hot english teacher, deep friendships, gang wars, worries about career goals, struggles to decide whether to stay back in india or move to US, growing up from kids to be men and women.

Add to that, there is also a chapter on graduation towards the end of the movie.

The movie definitely leaves you with a heavy heart and tonnes of nostalgia.

Is it just me or this is real?

When the gates open...

Children walk to the school..
From the safety of mom's warmth.

Workers assemble at the factory..
Prayers never said.

Politicians are driven to their chambers..
Files smile at the luck.

Players enter the camp..
Sweat, Thirst and Desire.

Traders place the bets..
A shirt lost and and a feraari won.

Professor knocks it down.
The colour ain't changing. He laughs..

The old man at the sea..
Waits for his freedom.

A girl smiles and blossoms..
First love.


In a patch of land not very far away.................


A man opens fire.
He isn't one of us.



I wake up...
from a nightmare to an other.

Creed, justice and Marijuana!

I just found out that Marijuana is far better for you health-wise than cigarettes. It's a medical fact!

My question is why is marijuana illegal and cigarettes are legal if this is the case?
A probable answer is that the primary motive of the worldwide law and political systems is not public health and well-being. But, i don't want to be cynical today.

The evening is just too pleasant!

Funny things

Dear Silence,

Trust you are doing great.
It was nice meeting you last week. We hardly talked though. Guess all the noise at the restaurant distracted you? I wanted to tell you how much i loved the way you held the flowers. And when you sipped the wine, it felt like you were weaving symphony. Wish i can meet you again soon. I call often but i don't seem to get through?

Love,
Sound

P.S: You will receive this message late as am sound and not as fast as light!

Reply from Silence:

Dear Sound,

I am silent but you are dumb!
How can i ever meet you?


Reply from Sound:

Dear Silence,

There is no physics in dreams. It's all geography.

God of long things!

Faith does strange things to people. You somehow garner the strength to achieve the otherwise arduous and impossibly cruel tasks. Life starts looking like an easy drive on a half-volley.

I was witness to several acts of faith over the last weekend. A trip to tirupati with family helped in a lot of ways!

Tirupati, the abode of lord venkateshwara, is a place full of wonders. The mind-boggling queues do not worry the devotees at all. Infact, they almost enjoy the long wait! The average wait-time for a chance appointment with the lord is approx 4-5 hours!! This is if you belong to the privileged sorts of queues (the ones with reco letters from prominent politicians, etc.). A poor peasant typically waits for 12-18 hours to get a sneak peek at the lord!!!!!

The 'darshan' is a big tragedy. You are already too tired by the time you reach the crux of the temple and are in no mood to pray. Also, you will be pushed off by fat khakhi-walas/poorly clad pujaris in an instant. A nanosec is all you ever get! And, people typically close their eyes in front of the god. That esentially means that not more than a small portion of the devotees actually have a full glimpse of the lord.

The story isn't limited to the main temple where the real slim lord is located. Around the main temple, lots of smaller ones co-exist. Each one has a story. Interesting ones i should say. I often wondered if several of those temples were just plain jokes by the erstwhile feudal lords. The joke would have been a result of a chance conversation between two weekend friends.

Sometime during 14th century, the conversation between a rich merchant and a not-so-popular king on a dull sunday would have been like below:

Merchant A: "Dude, am gettin bored these days! Not enough golf!! Also, my wife is in the states with her relatives!"
King B: "Ahh, sorry to hear that bro! Am bored too. My wife is back again. Let's build a temple for timepass. We will also earn a lot of mudras through ads!!"
Merchant A: "Kewl idea man!!!"


And so were created dozens, hundreds, thousands and lakhs of temples across villages, towns and cities alike. Back then, the population must have been fairly low and the temples were never really crowded. But, the prosperity of last several centuries (read good rains) resulted in a population explosion leading to crores of devotees on streets. They all have a single-point agenda. Stand in a queue and visit a god! We devotees typically keep a score. It's similar to a fico-score. We call it the darshan-score. The one who drank the maximum 'theertham' (holy water distributed at the temple after darshan) and climbed the highest number of steps is the most reliable devotee. And temples usually issue blessings at lower interest rates (like a bank issues cheap credit for ppl with high fico scores) for devotees with high scores!!

Whatever that means, the fact is that the long queues are constant throughout the day at all kinds and sizes of temples. All that a true devotee has to do is chant "govinda govinda" ! It acts like a crocin pill to the fever caused by all the evils of capitalism, inefficient democracies, inadequate educational institutes, poor form of justice, pathetic infrastructure and gallons of corruption.

God bless.